Gathering-of-the-Day

Read between ** for the shorter version. The rest is crap anyway.

*At noon time, I arrived at bex's place and we had our board meeting for '3 girls on the road'! Just a reminder, we're selling GOOD FOOD at the Sports Bazaar at Central Forum from 17 to 19 Jan (this Wed to Fri), 12noon to 6pm! Please do support us. For those who requested my presence, I should be around all day for Wed, after 2pm for Thurs and after 4pm on Fri (this is all tentative).

In the evening, I met up with my Cedar 4/O classmates! We had steamboat and many laughs but I had to leave early to go over to my brother's (Jansen) place. I left after the steamboat but they went to the new shopping complex at AMK and then to Clara's place.*

Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
And you begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best
Cos after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

How to save a life
How to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

How to save a life.

I caught a glimpse of my old self today. Rational old me. The person who thinks with her head and not her heart. Well, I almost forgot that I had learned later in life not to make decisions based solely on my rational self but to inject some heart into it as well. When rationality conflicts with the heart, well, I suppose the rational side wins. It's easier to reason and substantiate what the head wants rather than what the heart wants. On hindsight, it was my emotions that had taken over. My already angry self just went into a state of frenzy. I should have taken advice and stayed in isolation. That way, we're all better off.

There's too many hazy areas. Too much doubts. Too much futile analyses. Too much time wasted on endless thoughts. Too much energy to fuel this roundabout. Too many smiles and jokes to hide the pain. Too much tears shed on assumptions. Too many things that I don't want to be sure of but sometimes I just need some answers whether I like them or not. It's time to stop living in denial. Let's just say I've succeeded in many other aspects of life but in the one aspect which matters the most, I've failed. I'm not perfect. Congratulations to me, myself and I. It's in pieces again.